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Mercy

March 4, 2007 By

In the kind of work I do at a charitable organization, I often struggle with the concept of giving to the poor versus enabling someone who is caught in a cycle of dependence through their own choice. I looked up the definition of mercy in Wikipedia. Here’s what I found: “Mercy is compassion or relief given to an undeserving recipient.” When I think of the undeserving recipient, I think of myself as the recipient of God’s mercy in my undeserving state of sinfulness. Jesus died for me, whether or not I would accept Him, it was not conditional on my treating Him right. In fact, those that crucified Him spat in His face, beat, whipped and insulted Him. He still had compassion and mercy for them when He said: “Father forgive them, for they know not what they do.”

So how am I to treat the person who calls for money, who has been round all the churches that day demanding for their car insurance to be paid or they will go to jail, who keeps changing their story and whose husband is in jail, when I know that 90% of those jailed in our area are meth addicts? We don’t pay bills as a policy, but what is our response to be? We offer a life-changing relational budget program in which she can get out of debt permanently – she is not interested. We offer clothing and other material goods if these are needed – she just wants us to pay her bill. We pray with her and hope that we have sowed a spiritual seed.

Is it compassionate to feed someone and send them away with no hope of changing their circumstances? Is it merciful to give them money that will most likely pay for the next drug fix? I think that what Jesus did was provide for a need we all have – forgiveness of our sin and the gift of eternal life in heaven. He did not rain down dollar bills on the needy. In fact, before healing someone, he often forgave them their sins as the answer to their core problem, then healed them as a visible sign of His power to the unbelieving.

Perhaps the way to distinguish when and who to help is to ask the question of whether we are providing for a real need, or just getting them out of our hair and off our conscience by fulfilling the demands of the moment. If I were to ask this woman “what do you really need?” perhaps she would have to say she needs freedom from addiction, someone to walk alongside her and help manage her finances, someone who will not abandon her like her husband when he is paying for crimes he committed. Until she comes to that realization, it may be detrimental to perpetuate her situation, to keep her out of jail for a while, or worse, to feed her addiction. She will become dependent on the giver and return for more bills to be paid, not learning anything about her intrinsic value in Christ and how He wants to set her free from her problems, self-inflicted or not.

They call this ‘tough love.’ I find it hard to swallow. I am not yet at peace with it, maybe because I was never a parent. I want to solve all this woman’s problems, show her who she can be in Christ, soften her demanding tone of voice, get her off drugs or whatever it is that causes her to ask for money from a perfect stranger and be upset when she doesn’t get it. God’s heart must ache when He offers us the answer to all our problems and we turn away, rejecting Him, thinking we know how to run our own lives. The compassionate heart aches when mercy is rejected, but how many undeserving recipients are eager to accept mercy? It takes a brokenness of spirit, a humble attitude to receive something from the giver with genuine gratitude when you know you can never repay the debt. Jesus’s heart was touched when the one leper returned to thank Him for his healing. The other nine walked away and said nothing, but He did it willingly for all of them – this is unconditional love.

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Justice and love

December 23, 2006 By

As I look at the Bible with the big picture view, there appears to be a constant state of tension between God’s justice and His love. In the Old Testament, justice reigns, typified by the Ten Commandments written on cold, hard tablets of stone, while in the New Testament God demonstrates His love for humanity, personified in the warm bundle of the baby in Bethlehem.
The story of the Bible has two main protagonists, Adam and Jesus. Their lives are in sharp contrast in the consequences of their actions:
When Adam sinned, justice prevailed, bringing punishment and death.
When Jesus died, love prevailed, bringing forgiveness and eternal life Adam came first, setting the stage for God’s holiness to be revealed, a God who dwells in unapproachable light, whose nature demands truth and justice. Adam’s catastrophic choice to disobey God in the Garden of Eden caused the scales of justice to weigh heavy with guilt and sin and God’s heart to weigh heavy with grief over His creation. Sin was rampant by the time of Noah and its excesses were an abomination in God’s sight, such that He chose to almost completely wipe us out with the Great Flood – a picture, I like to think, of the ocean of tears that He may have shed in the anguish of His Great Love for us.
Mankind was given a second chance through Noah’s descendants, but sin still had us in its grip, and we needed a benchmark to show us right from wrong, since personal conscience had failed. So God gave Moses the law on the summit of Mount Sinai, where other men could not approach without being destroyed by God’s holy presence. The law was the yardstick for us to follow and to know God’s heart for how we should live. We did not thrive under the law. Kindness, goodness and mercy were not the order of the day and there was a dark period of 400 years between the Old and New Testament where the Bible is silent, perhaps because the events of that period were unspeakably evil.
Jesus’ advent into time and space 2,000 years ago tipped the balance of the scales in our favor, when He paid the price of sin for all who would receive Him. God’s love through the sacrifice of His son made it possible for justice to be carried out, but for mankind to be saved. We cannot reverse Adam’s choice or all the wrong things we have said and done, but we can accept God’s love for us, ask for forgiveness and “turn from our wicked ways.”
The angels are watching to see whether we will choose life or death. Choose life and show the spiritual realm that we love God and are grateful for His grace, without having seen Him.

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Why so much suffering?

August 23, 2006 By

Look closely, a battered orange starfish clings to the rock – Just lately we have been bombarded with personal prayer requests from family, friends and acquaintances who have fallen sick, been recently diagnosed with a disease, or become victims of a serious accident. It lays heavy on our hearts to see all those people we care about suffering pain and heartache. It hits close to home when it’s people we know. We have been through some medical tests of our own that thankfully proved negative after an anxious waiting period.

It brings up that age-old question of why there is so much suffering in the world. For a believer who trusts in the goodness of God, it is critical that we don’t confuse the issue with our emotions and lose faith.

I admit I was angry with God as a young person when a close friend died of a brain tumor after a lingering and debilitating illness. I remember walking along the road from the hospital talking out loud to God, choking back the tears, questioning Him with an ache in my heart and a million unanswered questions. It was the beginning of my walk away from God at an emotional level, keeping Him at arm’s length, slipping into isolation as a Christian as I eventually stopped going to church for years. The key component I had lost was trust, trust in God’s character. Had I misunderstood who God was? Filled with doubts, I was disillusioned, deeply saddened, but I threw the baby out with the bath water, not realizing the baby was me. I didn’t ever stop believing in God or Jesus, as I continued to debate spiritual questions with colleagues throughout my career, defending the faith, but with such a watered down testimony, I was no doubt totally ineffective.

Ironically, it was a series of sad things that happened in my own life that brought me to my knees, to full surrender and complete trust in God, beyond mere intellectual assent. Suffering is the refining fire that either breaks or makes us. It cannot leave us untouched or uninvolved with the deeper questions of our existence. It can cause us to look up for our salvation, or to hang our heads in despair. I hope that you will always choose to turn to the one true God in your life’s pilgrimage through the valleys of hardship. Like the starfish, keep clinging to the Rock when the waves come crashing down.

For some answers on the topic of suffering, I can recommend Dr. Ray Pritchard’s sermon: “Why is there so much suffering in the world?”

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Mircaculous Encounter

August 7, 2006 By

Until an adult is confronted with the supernatural, it is quite normal to be a skeptic, or at least a doubter. For many of us, it’s easier to question, analyze, and dismiss than to simply believe. As a child, faith came more naturally than analysis for me. I can’t recall at what age the transition from child-like faith to doubt occurred. You will read in my story how my struggle with doubt collided with an undeniable experience.

The experience I’m sharing with you is a true personal story.

Before giving the details, I’d like to preface this supernatural event by admitting that, even now, 39 years later, I don’t fully understand why God chose to bless a skeptic in this manner. I still feel very undeserving all these years later, especially because I was full of doubt on that day.

It was Easter Day, 1974, when I headed to the hills with two other dirt bike enthusiasts to ride my new 185 cc motorcycle. As I recall, it was a beautiful day and all I could think of was getting some air between my bike tires and the earth. For those that love to ride, there’s nothing better than lifting off a mound of dirt like you’re headed toward the sun.

We were into the ride for what seemed to be an hour or so when I came to the top of this huge hill. It was very steep and had a small ravine at the bottom. At this point, I swallowed my hesitation and took off down the hill, crouched on the pegs of the cycle with my foot at the ready to break if the momentum built too fast. In the back of my mind, I remembered one of the rules of downhill cycling – never, under any circumstances, use only the front brake. So with this rule in mind, I headed downhill, unaware that my life would change forever.

Immediate panic struck me when, halfway down, my foot slipped off the bike peg, causing me to lose balance and sit on the seat. Now I was focused on keeping the bike upright and holding on, not using the front brake of course.

By the time I hit the bottom of the hill, went into the small ravine and up the other side, one of my friends saw me and my motorcycle go airborne and he said that, halfway through the flight, it was one of the most beautiful jumps he’d ever witnessed. But the opposite was true on the descent. My front tire was headed straight toward earth like the nose of a rocket headed towards terra firma. No sooner did the front of my bike make contact with the dirt, my body made contact with the bike.

Colliding face first, the full-face helmet, protecting my mouth and chin, was no match for the metal handlebars. The impact was so severe, two front teeth were immediately sheared off at the gum line. The impact contorted my spine and I lay motionless while my friends came to my aid. With blood flowing from my mouth and an inability to stand, I was carried to the car and rushed to the nearest hospital where the doctors advised me to spend the night for observation. But without health insurance at that time, I refused their advice, although I was in a lot of pain.

My friends took me from the hospital to my parents’ home where I lay on their sofa, waiting for Dad and Mom to return home. When they arrived, Mom was very concerned when she saw me and I could tell by the look on her face that I must have been in bad shape. Dad reminded me I should have never purchased that dirt bike against his advice. Not only were my spine and teeth hurting, so was my ego in disappointing Dad. As I recall, it was several days before I could leave the house. I could only sleep a few hours per night due to the pain in my back. Eating was tricky too, because even breathing through my mouth would send me through the ceiling (the roots to my front teeth were exposed). So until I could go to the dentist, I had to eat through a straw.

After weeks of discomfort, I decided to go for more x-rays and scheduled an appointment with an osteopath. He advised that I go to a surgeon, as there was nothing he could do for me. Apparently, my spine had been damaged to such an extent that, in his opinion, surgery would be my only option for recovery.

During the days that followed the accident, the discomfort from the sheared teeth improved, especially when the dentist finished two root canals and implanted some temporary replacements. But the back pain persisted and seemed the most uncomfortable when sitting or lying down. Even though I was advised to seek further medical options, it didn’t seem feasible at the time, due to the lack of insurance.

While all this was going on, I didn’t realize that a divine appointment was planned. It was during this time that I was working at a music store and invited a friend to church. Although I told her that I probably couldn’t sit through an entire service, we decided it would be fun to go together.

I suggested we visit a congregation that I didn’t normally attend, so my friend would have a good experience in a larger church setting. But coordinating our schedules was difficult. She had to cancel one weekend when a conflicting appointment came up and we finally settled on another date, unaware that God had planned a specific time and place for a miracle.

I stopped by her house Sunday morning and we headed to church. It was about 40 minutes to our destination so we had plenty of time to talk. I shared again that my back was very uncomfortable and I might decide to leave early if the discomfort worsened.

Once inside the church, I spotted a wheelchair-bound friend (a disabled Vietnam Vet.) I introduced him to my friend before the service started. Unknown to us, there was a special speaker scheduled that morning – a woman from China who had experienced various supernatural encounters. They introduced Nora Lam (who’s story would eventually be told in a movie). It was intriguing to hear about this far-away place. Five or ten minutes into her talk, she stopped abruptly and hesitated for several seconds. Then, some very unusual things started to take place. She said in broken English something about a woman that had a deaf ear – that God had healed her. Almost immediately, a woman rose to her feet and started screaming with joy, jumping enthusiastically. Nora asked her to come up front. All the while I was doubting the authenticity of this, and concerned about my friend’s reaction. How ironic – I was questioning the very presence of God that would soon be changing my life.

Nora asked the ecstatic woman a few questions, confirming one ear was deaf and now opened, and went on to give her talk as if this type of healing was quite normal. After a short time, Nora once again stopped and said there was a young man in the audience with back problems and: “God is going to heal you, please come forward.” I looked at my friend and asked, “I wonder if the Vietnam Veteran I introduced you to may be healed?” As I recall, she responded with a big-eyed smile and shrugged her shoulders.

A few seconds after Nora resumed her talk, she stopped again and asked that the young man who was in the motorcycle accident come forward. Even though I knew God was speaking through this woman, and I knew she was talking to me out of a crowd of perhaps 350 people, my split-second reaction was embarrassment. “I can’t stand and go forward” I thought to myself. But an instant later, I knew I had to respond, since God was so specific in revealing the details of my back problem to a woman from China. In the act of standing, all pain that I experienced just seconds before, immediately ceased, and I just stood there for a moment before heading toward the front.

Nora approached me with microphone in hand and asked if I was in a motorcycle accident. I confirmed this was true and that my pain had immediately vanished. I publicly gave praise to God. He not only healed me, but chose to do so in spite of my doubt and skepticism. I believe God even purposed for me to attend on that particular day, and revealed to a total stranger from China the reason why I needed supernatural healing.

As I returned to my seat, I noticed tears of joy streaming down my friend’s face, who by now was convinced, as I was, that this was a Holy encounter.

Years later, I don’t understand why God healed me, not someone else, especially with my skeptical attitude. I am truly grateful for His love and grace, in spite of me, and hope this story will bring glory to God the Father, Jesus Christ His Son, and the Holy Spirit.

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A Heart of Gratitude

July 30, 2006 By

I recently heard an interview with Carlos Santana, focusing on the highlights of his musical career. Happily married to the same wife for many years, he had developed a belief in some enduring values, one of which struck me as worth thinking about. It went something like this – a sense of gratitude brings joy to the soul. I had an off-day not long after that interview where the sunshine and the beautiful scenery were unable to touch me. Good feelings come and go. During the valley experiences, I have sometimes been in the habit of writing 5 daily reasons to be thankful in a journal called “Counting my Blessings.” It’s amazing what healing power there is in developing a grateful heart.

Since hearing the reflections of this musician, I have determined to cultivate gratitude and make a practice of thankfulness. In my experience, this does bring joy to the soul and chases away dark thoughts – an antidote to depressive thinking. It can restore lost feelings that bubble up again, replacing the monotone nature of sadness. Blessings are all around us if we have eyes to see them. We hear that the glass can be half empty or half full, depending on our attitude, and, while our attitude is important, as a Christian, I believe our cup can be full to overflowing.

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